Endorse Endorphins

Well, it's been a week since I last was at aerobics class. Today I'll be attending the Maxed Out class which combines strength drills and cardio.  I've been so busy getting ready for school the past few weeks that I barely noticed that I hadn't been going to the gym. Now that I'm back in school, and know what to expect as far as my schedule, I can now look again at getting a fitness routine together. It's back to releasing those Endorphins.  Endorphins are the body's natural opiate painkillers.  That's why when we're physically active the body releases these painkillers and we feel really good afterwards.  

Did you know that without Endorphins our bodies would be in constant pain? Endorphins are the body's natural opiate pain killer. During my training as an Addictions Counsellor, I learned (and witnessed) addicts withdrawing from opiates (morphine, heroin, to name 2). People who become addicted to opiates stop producing their own Endorphins (Opiates). Their bodies become dependent upon the opiate substance of choice. During their withdrawal period and sometimes, up to as much as a year afterward, an addict's body and mind will be in constant pain.  Sometimes it takes as long as a year after withdrawal and recovery to get our body's system to work properly again. Our bodies (those not in recovery from opiate addiction) would be in constant pain too if we didn't produce Endorphins. This is one good reason to stay away from any type of street drug.  I realize that opiates come in prescription form too, but the bulk of addictions are developed from the street drugs.

So, it's time now for me to get ready and go pump some iron and some Endorphins. Working out also brings me closer to my fitness goals. Endorse your own Endorphins today through physical activity (moderate level).  You will feel great afterwards.

The Fart and Cry Principle

The video above is called Breaking the Barrier by Bernie Hatefield. It's a short, funny video about being comfortable enough around another person to fart.  The guy in the video calls this Breaking the Barrier because he farts first. Of course, the guy in the video gets a rude awakening because his girlfriend won't stop farting. This video exaggerates for effect, but it fits in perfectly with my topic today.  My topic today is what I like to call The Fart & Cry Principle.

The Fart & Cry Principle does not mean that every time that I fart it's followed by me blubbering. David might say that when I fart it's followed by his endless blubbering (because of the smell), but I digress. The Fart & Cry Principle has to do with having a comfortable rapport with another person. I need to know a person well enough to know that I can fart and cry in front of them without them passing judgment on me. They also need to feel comfortable enough to be able to fart & cry in front of me.

 It's the level of comfort and the rapport that distinguishes how close we become to another person.  As you know, there are different levels of friendship.  We may only ever be acquaintances with some people.  Then there are other people that we feel in sync with almost immediately. And then there are other people who we are acquaintances with for a long time and then suddenly it seems a rapport begins to develop between you.


There are clues to how a person may treat you.  For instance, consider what they say about other people especially those who are closest to them.  How often do they talk about others in a negative light? Now, that doesn't mean they can't be annoyed with one or two people - afterall, we're all human. I'm referring to people who say things like, "Did you see what whatsherface did? She's really stupid!" If the person says a lot of negative things about those who are closest to them, please approach them with caution.  Just remember that one day that person will describe you in a negative light to somebody else because that is their pattern of behaviour.  Besides, how would such a negative person react if you farted or cried in front of them? Chances are they would describe the situation in a negative light to somebody else.

I personally feel on edge around people who cast everything in a negative light.  I don't feel comfortable around them and a rapport does not develop with them because I feel stifled. Comfort level and rapport are the most important things to me in a relationship. I like to feel comfortable enough around you to fart and cry in front of you.

Live Passionately, Love Passionately

With a look of smug satisfaction, I leaned back into my chair just far enough to fall off it.  I laid upon the floor and went into gales of laughter because nothing was going to spoil this moment.  This moment I realized that I was completely organized for school next week.  This is no small feat because you see, I have little more organization and planning to do due to my Learning Disability.  Additionally, this year I have a new Accessibility Advisor.  I met him a few weeks back, and he seems nice but I'm going to drive him a little crazy.  

My new advisor likes to put organization and planning off as long as he can.  I'm the complete opposite to that - I plan and organize things well ahead of time.  Procrastination has never been my friend.  Whenever I procrastinate I inevitably overlook important details.  I've learned that true organization begins with details. Plan the picky details first and it all comes together smoothly. So, when this advisor was telling me to wait until after the first week of school to put in my requests for a notetaker and a tutor, I already knew that wasn't going to happen.  His thought was wait and see if you need these services.  I already know that I need these services.  This morning I submitted my requests for these services.  Besides, if you're too late with your requests then they're not granted by the university.  My thought is, why wait to speak up if you can do it now?

 The previous question provides a nice leeway into my next topic which is about speaking up.  Many people feel inhibited about speaking up about things.  I'm not just talking about voicing an opinion, or speaking in opposition to something.  I'm talking about sharing feelings, giving compliments, and opening up too.  Instead, what most of us do is miss the opportunity to say what we want.  Then we regret not saying it and beat ourselves up over it, which to me, is an exercise in futility. Chances are that if you're moved to give somebody a compliment, or tell them that they mean a lot to you, the chances are that it's just what they needed to hear.  Don't be afraid to say it - you will gain from the experience.  I'll leave you with a quote, "Those who live passionately teach us how to love.  Those who love passionately teach us how to live" -Yogananda


 

Camping at Millersylvania State Park

Our camping trip to Washington State was awesome. Seattle is a beautiful city.  Our trip down there got stretched to 7-hours from 5-hours because we got caught in Seattle's rush-hour traffic.  That gave us more time together to talk, listen to music, and wonder how the weekend will unfold for us.  The weekend unfolded beautifully.

First, I want to talk a little bit about our cabin bunk-mates. They were the absolute best bunkies we could ask for.   They were friendly, outgoing, and fun.  I felt a particular closeness with one of them.  She was absolutely inspirational to me, and I enjoyed our discussions.  One night there was a couple, from another cabin, who were having sex very loudly.  There was discussion among the five of us to sit in front of the cabin, and hold up cards with our rating of their love-making written on them ~giggle~.  The rapport among us was very good.

The variety show and karaoke night was great too!  There is so much talent among my friends. Ohhhh, I can't forget that I had a wonderful massage on Saturday too! Oh, baby, how could I forget that? The people that I met there have truly made a difference in my life.  

Are your Goals SMART?

www.workoutsforyou.com/article_smart.asp

The above link is an article about setting S.M.A.R.T. fitness goals for yourself.

http://www.hr.virginia.edu/uploads/documents/media/Writing_SMART_Goals.pdf

The above link is about setting work-related goals.  Something I will need to do soon because I'll be going back to school, and doing research for a professor.  Busy girls need SMART Goals.

Setting fitness goals can be problematic for most people.  That's because most of us set goals that are too vague and we lose the motivation to focus on those goals.  Never fear though; psychology research to the rescue. Yes, psychologists and other researchers study what motivates us.  Some philosophers, such as John Locke, had already laid the ground work for research on motivation centuries ago. Basically, psychologists researched motivation, did experiments, then took Locke's principles and put a modern-day spin on them.  The reason being that after all the scientific experimentation was done, it turns out that Locke's observations were correct all along.  Now, some of you might say, well that seems pretty obvious to me so why would researchers waste their time, effort and money on something so obvious (?).  The point of doing rigorous scientific experimentation is to test thoughts that we take foregranted as true.  In other words, by testing things through experimentation, we can remove the wheat from the chaff (what is actually true and what is not true).

Goal setting can help motivate us especially if those goals are S.M.A.R.T. Goals (Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant (has meaning to you), and Time-bound).  I have a fitness goal of getting in shape for the Breast Cancer Fundraiser in April 2013.  That's still a little way off but it's more than realistic especially since I'm training at least 4 days/week right now.  This last Tuesday, I set yet another goal for myself and that is to be down 1 dress size before Christmas. This is how my goal fits into the SMART format:
Specific - down 1 dress size 
Measurable - it's about 20 lbs loss in 17 weeks or if I'm measuring inches lost then it's about 1 & 1/2 inches
Attainable - yes, it's still realistic.  It's about a pound & 1/2 - 2 lbs per week but it's still attainable.
Relevant - getting in shape and losing weight has meaning for me.
Time-bound - my time is up on Christmas Day for this goal :)  What a nice holiday present that will be.  Boxing Day sales here I come LOL!!! CHA-CHING! :D
SMART Goals can be used for anything in your life, i.e. emotional and personal development, work goals, school-study goals, fitness, anything you can possibly think of can fit into this model.  Hint: Write your goal down and remind yourself of it often.  This will help you to focus.
 

Weathering Life's Storms

A rose that has weathered a snow storm

Roses are my favourite flower especially pink coloured ones.  I've always been a romantic at heart.  I love these flowers because they symbolize romance and love, and pink is such a warm and soft colour that it truly complements the symbol.  What I think is striking about this photograph is that this rose has survived a snow storm.  As you can see in the photo, the sun is shining on the rose and soon the snow will melt from it.  There is a parallel between this rose and the way we weather the cold storms in our own lives. 

When we experience hurt in our lives we can either take on all the hurt ourselves or we can realize that shit happens sometimes. When we take all the hurt onto ourselves we set ourselves up for more hurt because we start building walls and obstacles that make it nearly impossible for anybody to get close to us.  We're forever vigilant that we not let anybody in who will hurt us. As they say, once bitten, twice shy. In actual fact, this type of reasoning is faulty because even those people who are closest to us do hurt us sometimes.  The difference is that we forgive them because we understand them and there's mutual respect (hopefully there's mutual respect). Additionally, if the walls we build around ourselves become too high, those walls can topple and fall on us. Whereas, if we realize that shit sometimes happens we don't take all the baggage onto ourselves. Instead of retreating and building walls when we're hurt, we reach out to others, we communicate with them and most of all we learn to love ourselves. The walls come down little by little. In other words, don't let the bad experiences overshadow your life and harden your heart. Trust people until they give you a reason not to trust them (as the First Nations saying goes). Where would the settlers be if it weren't for First Nations people trusting them? There would be no Canada or USA - but I digress. :)

As mentioned previously, the rose in the photo has weathered a snow storm. The sun is shining on that rose and soon the snow will melt from it. That rose is similar to us when we don't let our hearts harden. The storm comes in, things get cold and stormy, but only temporarily (storms don't last forever). When the storm is over, yes, we are covered with snow but we're no worse for the wear and soon the sun melts the snow and we continue on living.  Whereas when we harden our hearts, and build barriers we're not giving ourselves a chance to weather life's storms because we're weakening ourselves.We're in fact telling ourselves that it's all of our fault instead of realizing that shit happens. The storm moves in and we die from the cold we've created for ourselves.

It all comes down to loving ourselves and trusting ourselves. I struggle so much with loving myself but I am getting better at it. I would never tell my best friend that he/she was stupid and yet I tell myself that all the time. I am learning that when I have these negative thoughts about myself that I apologize to myself.  I don't deserve to be called stupid even if it is me telling that to myself. Once we become aware of our negative self talk then we can become active in stopping it. Until we realize it, we will continue to harden our hearts because we are being hard on ourselves.  Nobody else is doing this to us, we are doing it to ourselves.  So, give yourself a break and lighten up on yourself.  You'll be glad you did.

Yom Kippur

"Get that bottle opener ready to crack that beer!  It's almost sundown" such was the conversation amongst my friends at the end of Yom Kippur.  Yes, believe it or not, I used to celebrate Yom Kippur. For those of you who are not familiar with Yom Kippur, it is a Jewish High Holy Day (meaning it is very sacred).  It is a day of fasting and atoning for your sins. By fasting, I mean absolutely no water and no food at all for a 24-hour period. For people from a Roman Catholic background, it's what Catholics would call a 'Black Fast' .  It was a day of prayer and worship to God.

When I was young and single my roommate and I both belonged to the same religion, and we observed all of the Jewish Holy Days.  We did not celebrate Easter or Christmas or any of the mainstream Christian days.  I had an enjoyable life as a young, single woman. At the end of Yom Kippur, we would have our friends over, who were also fasting.  We would have beer and pizza parties to break the fast.  Being young we could get away with that.  My body would not be so forgiving of me now if I were to fast for 24-hours and then eat pizza and drink beer.  I would literally feel dead for 3 days after nowadays (I would feel as though I've just resurrected from the dead).  I know, it's sound sacrilegious for me to refer to myself as resurrecting, but that's just me.  I suppose I am sacrilegious these days to a certain extent. I respect other people's belief systems but I don't get involved in religious practices that much any more.  Occasionally, I will enjoy a First Nations Sweatlodge, and smudging but that's the extent of it.  I still consider myself a spiritual person, just not any one particular kind of spirituality.

So, what has this got to do with my physical training for the Breast Cancer Fundraiser? Not a damn thing! I just felt like reminiscing.